We have time for everything: to sleep, to run from one place to another, to regret having mistaken and to mistake again,to judge the others and to forgive ourselves. We have time for reading and writing, for making corrections to our texts, to regret ever having written, we have time to make projects and never respect them, we have time to make illusions and gamble through their ashes later on. We have time for ambitions and illnesses, to blame it all on ambitions and details, we have time to watch the clouds, advertisements or some ordinary accident, we have time to chase our wonders away and to postpone the answers, we have time to break a dream to pieces and then to reinvent it, we have time to make friends, lose them, we have time to learn our lessons and then forget them quickly afterwards, we have time to be given gifts and not understand them. We have time for them all.
But there is no time for just a drop of tenderness. When we are about to get to that too – we die.
I have learned some things during my lifetime, experiences that I am now sharing with you!
I have learned that you cannot make somebody love you; All you can do is be the beloved one. Everything else… depends on the others.
I have learned that, no matter how much I might care, others might not care at all. I have learned that it could take years to earn somebody’s confidence and only a few seconds to lose it. I have learned that it is not what you have in life, but who is there for you to have. I have learned that charms could be of use for only about 15 minutes, afterwards, nevertheless, you had better know something. I have learned that you should never compare yourself to what others can do better than you,
but you what you can do yourself. I have learned that what happens to the others is not as import as what I can do to help. I have learned that in whatever you might cut things, they will always turn out to have two sides. I have learned that when you have to depart from your dearest ones, you should do it with the warmest words, it could be the last time you see them. I have learned that you could carry on for a long time after stating you cannot take it any longer. I have learned that heroes are those who do what is right, when the ought to, regardless of the consequences. I have that there are people who love you but do not know how to show it. I have learned that when I am upset I have the right to be so but I do not have the right to be mean as well. I have learned that true friendship continues to exist even when great distances are involved and that goes for true love too. I have learned that, if somebody does not love you
the way you might want to be loved, it does not mean they do not love you with all their heart. I have learned that no matter how good a friend might be to you, they will inevitably hurt you from time to time and you will have to forgive. I have learned that it is not always enough to be
forgiven by others, sometimes you must learn how to forgive
your own self. I have learned that, regardless of how much you might suffer, the world will never cease running because of your pain. I have learned that the past and circumstances could alter your personality, but it is certainly you to be held responsible for what you become. I have learned that, if two people argue, it does not mean they do not love each other, as well as their not arguing would not prove that they subsequently are in love. I have learned that you should sometimes put the person in the first place and not their deeds. I have learned that two persons could be watching the very same thing and perceive two totally different meanings. I have learned that, in spite of any consequences, those who are fair and honest with themselves reach higher peaks in life. I have learned that one’s life could be changed in only a few hours time by people who might have never even known them. I have learned that when you believe there is nothing more you could offer, you will always find the strength to help a friend who is in need. I have learned that writing, just like speaking, could soothe your inner pain. I have learned that the ones you hold dearest are taken away from you far too soon… I have learned that it is far too difficult to realize where to draw the borders between kindness, not hurting the others and firmly sustaining your ideas.
I have learned to love in order to be loved in my turn.
by Octavian Paler